sUkmA JaRak

masa aku amek klas ‘kmahiran brfikir’ dulu, dr.salam slalu ckp..watever in ur life,bende yg susah akn jd mudah bile kite transfer pd kertas.anything,u juz hav 2 make a list of it..

…tp dgn mengandaikn keybod ni  pen n monitor ni kertas,i believe da hardest part now is when u cant thrash out all da things in ur mind to another layout..

da stgh jam aku tenung keybod ni tp xleh kuarkn 1 bende pun yg dok running dlm kpala aku.gosh!

"when he sings, emotion hangs on his guitar string.."

a guitarist..i juz knew him, juz knew he’s gud at playing guitar too.1 hot Sunday, he played me songs dat locked me in silent n cries in my heart.his notes flew sweet whispers in da air..walaupun suare die artificial awie or man bai,he keeps on drawing smiles on my face..i find  it so nice as though knowing he sang all da songs frm his heart.

late at nite..cant figure what word could best describe how i feel when i was closing my eyes,there n then he sent me beautiful rhythm of his guitar..it gives me such a wonderful nite.my imgination tells me..sitting next to his guitar, sing a luv song wit him. (which i know it might not happen..name pun imagine kan..) tp i oledy declare myself as his biggest fan..kalo die wat konsert i oledy book nk jd backup singer die..kalo x,beta ngamok!!hihi

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~few years back, i spent da nicest "5 days" in my life wit a musician frm seberang..we spent da shortest moment wit wide feelings to each other.unspoken feelings yet strengthly felt..

~i can stil picture da time when he stood in da middle of da crowd, looked at me n played his violin.lagu ape die nyanyi jgn tnye,i never heard of it..but 1 thing i knew,i was melt.hihi

~in da bus, b4 we had 2 separate, b4 he left..he played his guitar.dat was da time i realized "luv is in da air" i was then in streaming of tears.

~sUkmA jAraK..

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Saturday,07.04.07..

1st time in my life,brpijak dibumi ‘hutan melintang’..

sblum ni,xpnah denga pun name tuh.xtau pun tmpat tu kt negri mane..yalah,my sense of geografi not so gud anyway.i remembered when i said ‘i luv da sea n shore’,he said ‘kt hutan mlintang ade la laut’..Mase tuh jem kjap kpale aku pk..camne plak kt hutan ade laut..kt mane tu ek..

i had a very great Saturday in Hutan Melintang,Perak..provided wit a very gud tourist guide a.k.a ‘da Fisherman’..hihi

bgn kol 6am,brtolak kol 7.30am,smpai almost 9am..da journey wasnt so bad.thrill jugak ikut jln lama nih..yg bestnye bile wat keje potong motong kt double line.punye la nk cpat nk kejar sotong,ketam,udang n ikan kt hutan melintang tuh,dua keter naza merempit gler sepjg jln meredah bukit kota,tjg karang,sabak bernam heading to HM.keter2 len yg kene potong sume wat muke pelik..

smpai je kt HM,mr.Fisherman trus maen pranan..g terjah ikan..pastu udang n sotong..meriah gler!

mama kn fanatik sgt ngan sea creatures..kire mcm HM ni komfem la jd her faveret place pasni.aku gerenti org2 kt HM sure trkjut tgk ma n da gang ghairah sgt ngan ikan,UDaNG,sotong aritu..smpai kol 11 pun dok pusing2 kt plantar lg..ma nk ikan pari n ketam tp da xde sbb da lewat pagi da mase tu..bile ade bende yg die nk xde,mmg die aim nk g lg la tmpt tu nnt..

Hutan melintang x mcm prkampungn nelayan yg mcm kt pnang even though located kat tepi laut..xtau how to describe tp hutan melintang nampak unik dgn gaya trsendiri..cewah!cam describe model la plak..

dulu2 mase kt penang,i used 2 ikut my parent g jeti kt teluk bahang to buy ikan,sotong n all those things la..beli fresh dr boat yg br smpai kt jeti tuh..mcm same tp kt HM ni environment die laen.bile ade kt plantar2 tu,geram je aku tgk kapal2 ikan tu.kaki nih cam gedik je nk panjat naek kapal tuh..kalo xde org2 indon ctu,mmg aku da panjat da.

later after dat,we had lunch kt umah mr.Fisherman..he has a very wonderful children,frenly mother n kind wife..1st time jumpe tp happening sgt.it feels like altogether a big happy family.bile blk kg,ma xpnah miss kidnap daun2 ulam kg..xkira la kg sape pun.she has alwiz been like dat..smpai kg org pun die wat mcm kg sendr..xkesah la ape pun,anything for my mum,as long as she’s happy..Hutan melintang is a nice place,as nice as da people..not anymore a hope,i know i’ll b there again..

insya allah  (",)

he left..juz da same way raj did..he walked away in silence.

slalu cr stapler mest tuduh die amik..n he knew everytime i claimed he took da things,bende tuh mesti ade kt aku.hihi..slalu kalo nk rubber,mest die balingkn..not juz rubber,liquid paper,pensel..i used 2 brebut pen itam dgn die (i hate blue pen.lebey rela gune pensel or pen merah instead of blue pen..)..its kinda fun 2 hav sum1 2 fight wit..

i’ve lost my best partner..i wonder wat i did wrong 2 him.i treated him like my best frenz..sumtimes i brought him b’fast,sumtimes he bought me karipap,cakes,popiah,nasi lemak..he’s a very nice guy..he even understands me very well.whenever i feel bad or down,he never lost way of making me happy.

he was a very cooperative partner..mayb not so gud at his work but he improves n tried at his level best..i juz dnt hav heart of finding replacement.i wish i never had 2 interview those ppl.it makes me feel so bad..i’m still hoping dat he’ll come back..it has been 4 days n during these days,i feel so bad knowing dat he’s not around..frankly,its kinda difficult 2 face it..dat i’ve lost my best partner..my best fren.

~i remember his word.."meo xkan berenti slagi ida ade.." mayb guys mmg mudah lupe ape yg dieorg ckp..

Wyslawa szymborska’s poem on First Luv..

"They say
the first love’s most important.
That’s very romantic,
but not my experience.

Something was and wasn’t there between us,
something went on and went away.

My hands never tremble
when I stumble on silly keepsakes
and a sheaf of letters tied with string
— not even ribbon.

Our only meeting after years:
two chairs chatting
at a chilly table.

Other loves
still breathe deep inside me.
This one’s too short of breath even to sigh.

Yet just exactly as it is,
it does what the others still can’t manage:
unremembered,
not even seen in dreams,
it introduces me to death."

~everybody has their own luv story to tell..